Stable relationships, which contribute to our personal growth and bring us peace, can help our happiness and well-being. However, due to past hurts, fear of commitment or believing that you don’t deserve to be happy, you could be sabotaging them.
According to specialists, these are some signs that you are sabotaging your relationships, perhaps without realizing it:
1. You have idealized the concept of a couple… and your relationship.
Idealizing something automatically raises our expectations, which means that when these are not met, we reject our partner.
2. You compare your relationship or your partner.
Whether you compare it to your ex or your best friend’s relationship, in the long run it ends up breaking up the relationship and, many times, stems from not having healed a previous chapter or other insecurities.
3. You are an expert in finding fault… and coincidentally this is always your partner’s.
In fact, it seems that you are not only looking for the moment to blame him, but also to highlight his flaws and mistakes, even past ones.
4. You hide your feelings so as not to argue.
It’s not that you should always argue in a relationship, but if you don’t communicate or refuse to talk when your partner brings it up, you only break communication and trust, which ultimately damages relationships.
5. You constantly lie.
Even lying about things as simple as who you’re with leads to distrust and the relationship wearing thin.
This may be the product of past injuries, such as a toxic relationship or insecurity… although if it is due to fear of your partner, you should rethink why you are still there.
6. You invalidate their emotions or ignore them.
Not showing empathy for your partner and what they share with you ends up creating cracks in the relationship, because you are unconsciously making them understand that you don’t care.
7. You seek to control everything.
What is known today as toxicity, hides great insecurity and old fears, however, it is not something that your partner is willing or should bear, because, like everyone, he has the right to physical and emotional independence.
8. You reject physical contact.
We all have bad moments, in the same way, not all of us like constant physical contact… and it’s not bad. The problem is not talking about it with your partner, because nobody likes to be rejected when they try to show their love, which can end the relationship.
