“Never go back.” What does that mean? From the observations of successful people made by the psychologist and author of “Never Go Back: 10 Things You’ll Never Do Again” (Never go back: 10 Things you’ll never do again) Henry Cloud, discovered that there were certain ” Discoveries “that these people had-in their lives and in their work-and that once they had discovered it, they no longer returned to their old way of doing things. They were never the same again.
In short, they got it.
“Years ago, I made a bad decision in business and that led to an interesting discussion with my mentor,” says Cloud. “I learned a bad lesson,” I assured myself: “The good thing is that once you’ve learned your lesson, you do not go back.
“I was wondering what would be those who discovered those successful people had made and changed their way of doing things, what had propelled them to success in their work, relationships and life, I started investigating those discoveries, researching them for years. “
Although life and business have many lessons to teach us, Cloud observed 10 things in common that all successful people did not do again.
1. Go back to what has not worked
Whether it’s a job or a relationship that ended for some reason, we should not go back to the same thing. Expecting different results without anything being different is not an intelligent way to spend your life.
2. Do anything that forces them to be someone they are not
Before doing anything, we should ask ourselves: Why am I doing this? Am I ready for it? Does it overwhelm me? Is it sustainable? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, you should have a very good reason to continue.
3. Try to change a person
When you realize that you cannot force someone to do something, you give them freedom and allow them to experience the consequences. In this way, you find your own freedom as well.
4. Believe that they can meet everyone again
Once you understand that it is really impossible to have everyone satisfied, it is when you start living at ease, trying to satisfy the right people. The first you.
5. Choose short-term comfort to long-term benefit
When they know that they want something that requires a painful step, they do not care about the immediate sacrifice, since they know they will get a long-term benefit. Living under this type of principle is one of the fundamental differences between successful people and those who do not, both personally and professionally.
6. Trust someone or something that seems perfect
It is normal that we are attracted to people or things that seem “incredible”. We love perfection and we should always be looking to be it. We should look at people who are great at doing what they do, high-performing employees, exceptional people, friends who have a special character, and companies that succeed. Because when someone or something seems too good to be true, it is. But beware, the world is imperfect. Nobody or anything is free, everything and everyone has a defect. And if something or someone seems to have not, question.
7. Remove the view of the great objective
We work better emotionally and perform more in life when we can see our great purpose. For successful people, no event is the whole story. That’s why they never lose sight of their great image. Your great goal of life. It’s something that the winners remember every day of their lives.
8. Neglecting your attention
No matter how good something seems from the outside, only by taking a deeper and attentive look can you find out what you really need to know: the reality you deserve.
9. Not wonder why they are where they are
One of the biggest differences between successful people and those that are not in love and in life, in business and in relationships, successful people always ask themselves: what role am I playing in this situation, how have I arrived here and what can I do to solve it? Put another way, they do not look like victims, even if they were.
10. Forgetting that your inner life determines your outer success
The good life sometimes has little to do with external circumstances. Most times you feel happy and fulfilled, it has more to do with your inner attitude than with something else. With how you really look in your life. And it is that our internal lives contribute greatly to produce many of our external circumstances.
The opposite is also true: people who are still trying to find success in several areas of their lives can also point to one or more of these patterns as a reason why they are repeating the same mistakes.
Everybody makes mistakes. Even the most successful people out there. But what they have achieved – unlike unsuccessful people – is to recognize the patterns that are causing them to fail.