Relationships are a give and take. You give your time, thoughts, affection, care and love to your partner – and you expect to receive the same in return.
But people are different from each other. Some of us give more, while others give less. Some expect to receive more, while others are satisfied receiving less than they give.
Sometimes, what we are willing to give and receive is nothing like what our partner is willing to give and receive. And when this happens, the relationship is full of arguments, conflicts and more tears than smiles.
That’s why communication is the key. You need to maintain a fluid dialogue with the person you love. You need to want to learn more about each other, trying to understand to make the necessary adjustments so that your relationship goes well.
This may sound exhausting, but if you’re with the right person you should not feel that way.
Do not wait for your partner to read your mind. You should not assume that your partner is in tune with your wishes and needs and you know everything you want and expect at all times.
He / She also has his life and his things to worry about. Talk to your partner and tell him what you need. That will make life easier for both of you.
It’s funny. If we all learned to express what we need in good words, we would be much happier. So many relationships have failed because neither of them knew how to ask for what they needed!
People are too afraid to ask because they think they should not.
And that is fatal! Not only should you ask, you need to ask. In fact, there are some things you should never stop asking in your relationship. Here are some:
1. Consideration
Being in a relationship with someone means that you are taken into account, that your ideas are heard and your opinion considered. Of course you can make decisions on your own to make things more efficient, but you must be part of the important decisions.
Do not be afraid that your partner knows that you want to be a more important part of the decision-making process.
2. Time
Everyone has goals and passions to pursue their relationship outside. Finding the perfect balance between work and love is the only way to achieve happiness.
If you do not get enough time from the person you love, let them know. Obviously tell it in a good way, taking into account your dreams and work objectives, but letting you know that there are things that go beyond the line -if it was the case-.
People think that love lasts forever, but nothing is further from reality. If you allow yourself to be too far away from your partner, there will be a day when the space that separates you will be forever.
3. Presence
The only thing worse than having a partner that is never, is one that is physically but not emotionally.
Feeling that your partner is not there, when it really hurts like hell. At last you have time to be together, but you are further away than ever. It is not always easy to put aside the trash that happens in our lives, but you deserve more than a walking body at home that does not feel or suffer.
Ask him what time you can have a time to be together and try to squeeze those moments for you two. Do not limit yourself to doing it only for yourself, do it also for the person you love.
4. Empathy
You probably think that we should be able to empathize with the person we love. And we are good at doing it … until life gets in the way.
At the end of the day we are egocentric beings. We live life through our own eyes and those of no one else. However, being together means we have everything possible to put ourselves in the place of the person we love.
Empathy is the channel through which love flows. It is the way our souls communicate, the connection that allows that spark that starts everything. It is also something that we have to work in other areas of our lives, a social skill that will help us when life gets complicated with their little messes.
Remind the person you love that you will always need to try to understand how you feel.
5. New
Relationships begin to fall apart at the moment we settle for things as they are. This does not mean you should not be happy with how things are now, but you should always go further for more. You should seek to continue experiencing more new things together.
What is the purpose of your relationship? If it’s getting married, having children and growing old together, your relationship will fail. The big goals are very important, but more important are the small goals that we can create on a daily basis.
Passion is nourished by novelty. Comfort is what kills her. If your relationship is starting to be a bit dull, do not be afraid to ask your partner for some spice to spice it up.
6. Effort
The people are not perfect. Neither you nor your partner are you. We make mistakes. We lose contact with ourselves, which leads us to lose contact with the relationship. We spend much of our lives losing ourselves and meeting again. Why do you think it will be different in your relationship?
This is not about how lost things seem to be in your life. This is about how much effort you are doing to keep your love alive. If you do not think your partner is making any effort, tell them.
Be reasonable in showing your opinion, and be willing to truly commit. Help him to understand your partner that without effort there really is no reason to continue being part of the other’s life.
Love is not just about giving and receiving. Love needs to be worked, built, strengthened and protected. And like a flower, watered almost daily.