A long-term relationship can retain much of the charm of the early days, to achieve it you need creativity, overcome laziness and comfortable routines. Ten recommendations to keep the emotion and the illusion alive.
1. Every day on the plan of conquest
To assume that you have already won the game and that you do not have to do anything else to conquer the other is the first step to the deterioration of the relationship. Remembering the most useful strategies at the beginning of the relationship and applying them, as well as new actions based on the knowledge of the couple, will keep the spark and emotion and prevent the other or self become something as obvious as Living room sofa.
2. To have a life of their own
When all the experiences you have are lived as a couple, there comes a point where there is nothing new to talk about. Having your own friends, individual interests, independent activities of the couple, is convenient for both the person and the relationship: oxygen, gives topics of conversation, propitiates new activities, new friends, in short, enrich the everyday.
3. Modify routines
Routines prevail because they are comfortable, but they can become automatic and therefore lose the emotion. Breaking them up is easier than you think. It is giving space to spontaneity, daring to make proposals out of the ordinary and change comfort by action. For example, take advantage of a sunny day in the week and find yourself somewhere in the city after work to talk while night falls.
4. Interested in what the other does
The hobbies, tastes, interests and knowledge of the other, can contribute much to the universe itself. There will always be an angle of what the other does, which can generate curiosity in the couple. It’s not just saying “I do not like football” but trying to understand why he likes the other. With this attitude prejudices are overcome and horizons are broadened. In addition, spaces are created for sharing.
5. Have exclusive moments to share between two
When there are children in between, there is little room to share as a couple. Grandparents, uncles, the family in general, can be a great help to have a few moments alone. Also in everyday life you can reserve some spaces to live as a couple: when the children have gone to bed or early, before they get up. The fact is never forget that the other, other than being “the father or the mother of my children, is my partner.”
6. A good sexual relationship
Biology influences sexuality, but also the psychology of both. Daily stress and fatigue are not the best companions for a relationship. Laughter, on the other hand, distenses and allows a more tranquil approach. Finding or creating appropriate (also emotional) environments and avoiding “automatic” encounters are good ways to maintain a dynamic and exciting relationship. Preparing the food together, without hurry and announcing it in advance so that both are in the same tonic, is a good way to get ready for sex.
7. Always be a challenge
Eduardo Punset, Spanish scientist, says that one of the fundamental factors of Homo sapiens to be happy is to have a challenge, something that has to be achieved. What is believed already achieved loses interest. The concept of unconditionality in the couple is dangerous and promotes irresponsible attitudes and actions: “You will be there, whatever you do”. When both people are clear that they have to “win” each other day, they do their best and do their best to keep the relationship going.
8. Make caresses a novelty
In the caresses the instinctive and the rational lives together. Tenderness, solidarity, support, are feelings that are expressed many times more clearly and forcefully with a hug or a squeeze, than with words. The caresses have a therapeutic effect, reduce stress, relax and create an irreplaceable link. Its positive effect is for both the donor and the recipient. It can be caressed with the tips of the fingers or with the whole hand, with the back or with a simple set of fingers. There are hundreds of ways to explore and express feelings to each other.
9. Be buddies
Rather than being a partner, it is important that both of you are friends. Life can not only become obligations and responsibilities. They are building a life and a future in common, but also need spaces of relaxation, leisure, fun and mischief. Being small buddies, it creates a very strong and rewarding bond.
10. Avoid being the “typical” in anything
Getting rid of stereotypes or avoiding them is a way of maintaining “identity.” Each one builds his day and his life in his own way. It is easy to do it according to the preset recipes of society (the cantalet, mouthed and indifferent to the domestic …), but it is more enriching and rewarding to do it according to the formula itself.
A couple relationship is like a plant that must be cultivated day by day. Details and patience with each other are the basis for a loving relationship to work and endure over time. Following the above tips you can improve your relationship in a way that harmony and happiness visit your heart again. Learn them and practice them.