Forgiveness is not something we do for other people; it’s something that we do for yourselves. When you tell someone you forgive them it’s should come from your heart you should mean it. We forgive to get well and move on
1. The first step is to forgive yourself. Realize that we are all humans and deserve to make mistakes once in a while.
2. When you have time or become angry, write down exactly how you are feeling. Write down all feelings as it is better to put them on paper first than to lash out at the one that upset you.
3. Walk away from your writing for a while. Later when you have had time to clear your mind, read what you wrote down.
4. Ask yourself if this person is a meaningful part of your life. Was this person a here and now person or will this be someone that will be or you would like to be a lifelong friend or family member.
5. If the person has upset you or done something unforgettable, tell them that you forgive them but will not be able to forget what they did and then move on. If it is a lifelong friend, etc. set a time to enjoy a cup of coffee or even talk just one on one. Tell this person that you are upset but you have forgiven them and would like to move on from this. Then spend your time laughing and enjoying the conversation.
Tips and Warnings
• If this person is a part of your world, then forgive and don’t keep thinking about or bringing up the fault of the other person.
• It is okay to take as long as you need to be able to forgive someone.
• When you write down your feelings you release a lot of stress and anger.
• Forgiving yourself is the most difficult, but most rewarding thing.
• Forgiving is acceptable but do not let a person’s repeated behaviors make you a doormat (that is not acceptable and will not benefit you at all).
• Do not in a true friendship or relationship keep bringing up the negativity of past behaviors-this will cause anger and resentment and not lead to a good outcome.
